2 weeks ago we celebrated our ninth wedding anniversary. This is absolutely the latest that I’ve waited to write one of our anniversary posts (if you’ve been reading for any length of time, you’ll know that I write one each year: 8, 7, 6, 5….the other years are linked in those posts) and well, that is apparently par for the course this year when it comes to me blogging.
When I sit and reflect on nine years and the words that I want to spill onto this page, I find myself sitting on the fence between wanting to reminisce and remember all that our wedding day was, and wanting to recap what our ninth year actually held.
But both are important, I think. As I say every single year, there was something so sacred, so holy about our wedding day, and part of celebrating our anniversaries is celebrating when and how it started.
There’s something about being at “9”, that is starting to make me feel a little old(er). I kind of feel like the previous years still had us in the “newbie” phase, trying to attain one more notch on the anniversary belt but the reality is that we are now almost a decade away from the day when I walked down the aisle to All Creatures of our God and King, and we washed each others feet.
A lot of life has happened in these past nine years and while we knew we had all of our married days still ahead of us when we signed the papers and danced back up the aisle, we couldn’t predict what they would all hold.
But even without that knowledge, what happened on that wedding day laid the foundation for each one of our days together, and this year was no exception. The adventure of life together continued to ask of us to love beyond our own selfishness, to laugh with (and at) each other, to team up and work alongside one another, and to submit and trust each of these past 365 days to God.
And so I hope that even when I am remembering and reflecting year 49, on the brink of half a century, I will remember our wedding day and how it is because we made vows that were deep, meaningful and held promises, that we could make it to year 49 in the first place.
And so to you, Benjy,
Oh man, wasn’t this past year great? We have felt for a while like we were on the verge of change in our lives and year 9 of married life saw those changes come to fruition. We both changed jobs – and with these changes have come some great new adventures. (Bunk beds for 10 weeks at camp isn’t really at the top of that list, but still, an adventure nonetheless)
The thing I want us to remember now that we are through the other side of what have felt like so many transitions is what it was like to be in that transition. It wasn’t always easy to sit in a state of unknowns, and I think we felt that uneasiness. We both felt like maybe we weren’t doing enough to bring about the change we felt needed to come, and yet, when we would pray, and listen, we would both hear the same thing. Wait. And even when trusted mentors around us gave advice on how to seek out new things, we sensed that for this particular season, we were to wait.
And so we did. And another year of marriage passed in the waiting, and life happened, and the kids grew, and we fought and we laughed, and we took vacations, and we cried, and we watched tv series after tv series on Netflix, and we budgeted, and we begrudgingly did the unending list of chores, and we soaked in the little moments of watching our kids learn new things, and we prayed. And. And. And.
So much happens in a year, and that is true of every year, but there is something about this year nine that saw more of it for us. Benjy, remember when we were engaged and we were also sitting with unknowns about our future and we committed to praying together each night that God would lead our paths and allow us to end up in ministry together one day? Of course you remember, because we still, these nine years later try and do that practice of praying at night. It’s less frequent, to be sure, but as we sit on the other side of new jobs, and knowing what this next season of life may look like, I am amazed and humbled that God has absolutely answered that prayer.
He had led us so clearly, even when it seemed unclear, and there are more and more moments in our roles as parents and as ministry leaders that see us serving together.
And so while I’m guessing that we are somewhat “settled” for the next little bit (or maybe not – who knows what curveballs are coming!), I want you to know that doing year nine of marriage with you was such a privilege. Through the waiting, and the uncertainty, and the peace we felt in that midst, and the ordinary life that happened all the while, it was a privilege to be your wife. (Even on those days when it was hard to see it as a privilege, and we argued, or were selfish, or just plain grumpy – deep down, I knew it was a privilege)
I am so dang excited for all this year holds, and know that the more we turn to the One who united us together in the first place, the more adventure we will find.
I love you,