My Village

I’ve kept no secrets about the amazing community that Ben and I are a part of.  From our family (with whom we have great relationships), to our friends to our neighbours, to our church- we are blessed on all sides.

Lately, this has become more evident than ever as we have submerged ourselves back into the world of both working. As I wrote in my last post (which was an eon ago…sorry), we are living in a whirlwind of work, daycare, working from home and watching Ellie, to passing each other as we head off in different directions.  And it is quite safe to say that without the support of those around us, we wouldn’t be making this work, and for that, I am ever grateful.

It really does take a village.

2 weeks of the month Ben works 3-11 pm (the other 2 are 9-5).  This is great in a lot of ways, because on those weeks, he can watch Ellie during the day while I work.  The downside, is that my job ISN’T just a day job.  Two nights of the week I run youth programming, which means every other week, for 2 nights, both of us have to be working.  I have been working on finding 4 different people to watch Ellie on those 4 nights of the month, and I figured that making the ask of “can you commit to 1 night a month” wasn’t a big ask. Well, we had one dear friend offer to do ALL of the Wednesdays (2 a month), and another friend commit to 1 Tuesday a month.  So, I just had 1 Tuesday left to fill.

It really does take a village.

In true Karmyn fashion, I kind of left filling that last spot until the last minute. And by last minute I mean “well…I have youth in 6 hours and no one to watch Ellie yet…”.  I knew there would be people who would very willingly do it, but I wanted to be wise in how many asks I make of the same people. I also wanted it to be someone who was kind of close to our church office, so I didn’t have to drive all over the city dropping off and picking up the wee one.  So, I asked our small group leaders.  Before I went back to work, Ben and I attended a small group through our church.  Because I have youth on that night now, I can no longer go (Ben goes when he can), and it seemed like a long shot, but I figured it was worth the ask.  Just to cover my butt this one week.  So, I threw them an email, with many apologetic-no-obligation caveats, like “I know you have to lead growth group tonight, so no pressure”….but they very heartily agreed.  And so, I dropped Ellie off, headed to youth and came back to pick her up.

The group was still meeting, and it was SO nice to reconnect with some of them.  Ellie had slept well for them (really, she just goes to bed, so it’s not like they had to entertain her all night), and they were all SO glad to have her there. (We have a few older ladies in our group who love babies!).  I thanked them, hung out for a few minutes, and before I left, all of them said to me how much they would like to do this on a regular basis.  They really loved having Ellie around, and would love to support Ben and I in this way. “After all” they said “Ellie is a part of this group too!”.    And I couldn’t help but tear up.  I never expected that an entire group of people, who gathered each week for the purpose of community, would see us as a continual part of their community, even though we can’t attend every week and collectively, would step in to support us this way.  So, in a weird way, my growth group is babysitting Ellie once a month.

It really does take a village.

And that is just one example of SO many!  Ben and I have never had to cancel plans because there was no one to watch Ellie.  We’ve gone to concerts, plays, movies, dinners out, parties – and each time, there is someone willing to watch Ellie for us.  Either that, or the hosts of wherever we’re going have very much wanted Ellie to come with us so they can love her too.

I came home to a clean house yesterday because of another friend who had it on her mind and heart to clean for us. She spent 4 hours at our place and gave it the kind of clean that I only do maybe once a year.  She said that when she was a new mom someone did it for her and now it was her turn to do it for us.

It really does take a village.

There are my friends who don’t live in the same town as me, but who skype me, email me, swap baby stories with me, pray for me, and ask how we’re doing.

It really does take a village.

Having kids gives you a lot of experiences, feelings and emotions.  But one that I didn’t expect was the gratitude and humbleness I would feel from the people surrounding and supporting us.

My village.



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