You would think that if I’m not going to do monthly Ellie updates anymore, I could at least do them at logical times, like, say a year and a half right? That would have made sense, and almost made these semi-regular posts seem somewhat intentional. Ah well, you can’t win em all. (But I did take a few 18 month shots…but only 2 before the battery in the camera died…so, even that attempt was lame)
So, 19 months it is.
Ellie, can we just stop for a minute and talk about how somehow over the course of this 2013 year you officially stopped being a baby? I think mentally in my head, I was clinging to your babyhood until at least 18 months, but that mile-marker has LONG come and gone now baby and you are, in the truest sense of the word, a toddler. I have this bad habit of fast-forwarding people’s ages by a few months to round up to the next available year, and I’m sad to admit that in my head, it’s kind of like you’re already a 2 year old. BUT, I try and catch myself every time I do that and realize that you still have MONTHS ahead of you while you are one and I want to soak in every single day of that.
So, onward and upward to 19 months. Ellie, it was my own fault for trying to make you take these month pictures right before your nap, so, I can only blame myself, but really kid – could you have at least thrown me a little bit of a bone here?
A few things I want to remember about the 19 month version of you:
You still TALK UP A STORM. I have seriously started to wonder if I should stop recording in your baby book the words that you can say, because at some point, doesn’t it just get kind of ridiculous? (seriously, blog friends…when have I crossed the line into crazy mom territory?) I love it. I love being able to carry conversations on with you and have you totally understand what I’m saying, and for you to be able to communicate what it is you want and are experiencing. You are stringing a few words together in a row, which is great. Especially the time when you found a beer bottle of dad’s, held it up and exclaimed “Daddy’s water!” . Yes kiddo. You are correct. That IS Daddy’s special water.
You are a cheeseball. I have taken to calling you my ham sandwich, or my little hamster, because kid…you are a HAM. You often find things to laugh at all by yourself, and when you know we’re watching, you tend to put on a show. I love it.
When others are around, you are a different version of you. And that’s totally ok. You tend to take a little while to warm up in a crowd, and while you’re not shy or uncomfortable, you certainly don’t feel the need to talk a whole lot. You, my little Ellie, are a gentle little soul who doesn’t bat an eyelash when a kid comes and takes a toy away from you, or feel the need to make a fuss if things get loud. You just go about your business. (I’ll admit, sometimes your momma is the one who wants to take back the toy from the kid who stole it from you – but I’ll deal with my own issues on my own time)
You, generally speaking, are a good kid. Don’t get me wrong (seriously blog friends, don’t get me wrong here), you have certainly decided that part of your responsibility in this world is to fully accept the mantle of toddlerhood upon your shoulders, and tend to get a little testy if things don’t go your way. But, you generally are happy hearted, a good listener, and quick to calm down when you get mad. Also? Can we just discuss how DANG cute it is when you say sorry? I’m not sure you really get why we’re asking you to say sorry, as we explain things to you, but sweet mercy child, there’s a teeny part of me that likes when you get in trouble, just so I can hear you say “sowwy”
You still love to pray – and we still always have to pray for daddy and “bamqwa” (grandpa) each time. You hold out your little hands expectantly and ask “pay?”. Of course kiddo. We can pray as often as you’d like. And I hope and pray that God grows in you a heart that longs to hear from Him, talk to Him and pray for others always.
You are starting to find your independence, and I kind of love the bossy little phrases that come out of your mouth: “do it” (when YOU want to do it) “hold it” (when you definitely don’t want US to hold whatever it is you want to get your little paws on), “take it” (when you’re done holding whatever it is you want to be holding and would rather we carry it for you) and “get it” (when you’ve deemed it necessary to have US pick up whatever it is you’ve thrown off your high chair, for example). I know as your mom, I should probably be curbing these things in you, but part of me loves watching you explore how to figure out how to be independent, and I guess I’m just hoping I’m not creating a little dictator in the process. (Does it help that I make you say please?)
Ellie, the list of things I want to remember could probably go on, and on, and on, and I’ll be honest, I’m kind of afraid to end this post, because what if I’ve left out something that I’m bound to forget otherwise? No one really told me about that part of motherhood – the part where you just want to etch in your memory every little thing about every day of your existence, for fear of losing that memory down the road. I know the reality is that I WILL forget the little things, and I would be crazy to try and hold onto them all, but can you blame me for trying?
You, my little girl, are a treasure. A 19 month old treasure who continues to capture my heart in ways I never really expected.
Looking forward to years more of memory etching my little one. Happy 19 months.